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Regardless of whether it means confronting an awkward issue head-on or initiating sex, one of the biggest relationship frustrations comes from feeling like you’re always the first one to do something. When your boyfriend or girlfriend never texts first, it might trigger some insecurities or perhaps just straight-up irritation.
Does your boo tend to send short, to-the-point messages over text?
When you text about making plans, do they tend to call you instead of responding over text?
But your partner may prefer to chat over the phone or in person when it comes to other kinds of interactions.“Some people are just not natural texters,” says Masini. Basically, if you’re constantly checking in with them, you may just be beating them to the punch.
“They are more about being in the moment and they are all about who and what is currently with them — not what their phone or computer screen is saying or beckoning. So before you fire off one of your typical messages, give them a chance to send that “good morning” text or post-work text to ask how their day went.
If someone texts you first, the relationship may feel more real and more solid.”Texting first isn’t the only sign of interest, by the way.
If your partner has mentioned being swamped at work or they seem to be averse to texting in general but are still making an active effort to spend quality time with you, there’s no reason to panic about the fact that they aren’t texting you first.
“You may be surprised to learn that your partner doesn’t understand exactly what you want, intuitively, even though you think they do. You’re asking them to do something that they may not naturally do.”Hopefully, once they know that a simple text to say “good morning” or ask how your day is going will make you feel good, they’ll make more of an effort to be the one to reach out first.These will shown in a greyed out state to indicate history when a IM conversation is opened.When a conversation reaches 100 messages the client will loop and overwrite the history.Have their friends jokingly complained about how bad they are at responding?
If so, there’s probably no reason to take their habits personally — they may not initiate conversations over text simply because they don’t enjoy doing so in general.
“This is especially true during the first few months of a relationship when the relationship really is not solid — it’s exploratory!